We recently connected with Madman, author of The Groom Says, a blog about the ups and downs of wedding planning from a male perspective. Madman is a groom himself (he and his fiancée run a photography business: Joanna Wilson Photography). Learn more about The Groom Says below:
What’s your story?
I’m just a guy — a guy who one day became a groom, took a look around and realized that there were eight million magazines, websites and blogsites out there dedicated to brides and a mere handful that catered to grooms. So, being a writer by trade, I decided to pen my own blog, The Groom Says (originally titled Nod and Smile), to offer moral support and advice to the everyday groom via my own raucous journey through wedding planning.
Why did you start The Groom Says?
To be honest, I needed a release. I was engaged at the end of June, and by late September I was already feeling the effects of premature planning. I needed a safe haven, a cost-free internet domain where I could vent and spit and spew and be a stereotypical male while at the same time offering my own manly perspective on design and decor. What began as an exercise in self-control became something else entirely — primarily a place where brides can go to discover what their hubby-to-be is really thinking but not really saying. Community service, if you will.
What can grooms find at The Groom Says?
Hope. Hopeful anecdotes. Anecdotal hope.
What makes you different from other wedding blogs/sites (besides the obvious demographic)?
What’s bizarre is that a site called The Groom Says is read and appreciated more by brides than grooms. There are some amazing groom sites and blogs out there — like The Man Registry, Ben the Groom, Temple of Groom, The Plunge, and we’re all Twitter comrades — but what’s nice is that none of us have the same content, tone or perspective. An article once called The Groom Says “irreverent,” and I’ve been blushing since. I pride myself on the blog’s forthrightness, and thankfully I have a fiancée who finds more humor than hurt in the material. There’s a sense of play and playfulness and honesty in The Groom Says that I don’t think you’ll find in most wedding-related sites.
Do you have any advice for other grooms planning their weddings?
Oodles. But if I had to choose one to share with you now, it would be to have a sense of humor about all things wedding-related. “Oh, that’s easy,” you say, but it’s not. It’s easy to get overheated about these issues. You’ll be meeting lots of new people, reviewing lots of contracts, writing lots of personal checks. The best thing you can do for yourself, your partner and your relationship is to keep smiling through the happiness, the headaches and the horseshit.
Why should grooms avail themselves of online resources like The Groom Says?
Sometimes I think of The Groom Says as your lunch break read. Brides spend their mornings browsing The Knot, shopping Etsy for bridesmaid dresses, seeking out more pieces of inspiration for their ever-expanding notebook. It’s self-induced torture. The Groom Says is there to help you breathe a little easier, to hopefully bring some lightheartedness to what can be a very tense process. More often than not, I try to bring a worldly perspective to my posts, so it’s less about “my fiancee and I accomplished X, Y and Z” and more about “why do rehearsal dinners have a Jan Brady complex?” The idea is that there’s something for everyone to relate to — even those readers who aren’t planning a wedding.
Do you have regular categories or features on the blog or is it just as subjects come up?
I used to do a “daily inspiration” post, but it became exhausting and repetitive. I purposefully don’t review things like “homemade groom bow-ties” or specialty products unless they’re really unique or have some comedic value. I DID do a piece on the amazing and inappropriate Go-Girl and its male counterpart, the Stadium Pal. The only regular feature I’ve maintained is the interview series (check out the most recent groom chat with my father, The (Father of the) Groom Says). These days it’s more touch and go. And since we’re less than five months from the big day, it’s no surprise that I have no want for new blog topics.
Anything else in particular you’d like our audience to know about you and The Groom Says?
Readers can always reach me by email at firstname.lastname@example.org. I love meeting other grooms, couples, vendors, industry folks. Planning a wedding can sometimes feel like you and your loved one are battling the world on your own — but it’s just not the case. There’s so much to discover out there — so many people I’ve met who are willing to give and help and share and inspire. You just have to be open to it.